Remembering 9-11

I'm watching "911- America Remembers".   My thoughts and prayers are with all of the people that lost loved ones.  It is heart wrenching to see all of the people there remembering that horrible day.  It kind of puts things in perspective.  I am so blessed and realize that I have so much to be thankful for.

Figuring out what "Mid-life" is all about

I've had a couple of conversations with a friend that is close to my age.  We are both having some issues about the things going on in our lives at this time.  She looked up "Mid-life crisis" on Wikipedia and thought that maybe we were having one.  I just read Wikipedia's definition and eh, maybe we are experiencing somewhat of a mid-life crisis.  I think that mine has been coming on for a couple of years.  My dear mother's death has created a huge void in my life that nobody else can fill.  Loosing my father and brother was very difficult but I still had my mom.  I think that loosing our parents changes our entire make-up.  A part of our identity is gone.  Yes, we love our spouses and children more than I can describe here, but, we still have them.   It's a big adjustment and maybe those of us experiencing it can help each other by blogging.

Wikipedia's definition included loosing parents and having your children grow up and leave.  VOILA, that's two for two.   For the first time since I've been a mom, both of my children live on the other side of the country.  My daughter (my baby) just moved to Arizona.  So, now both of my children are there, together, which is great, but difficult for me.  This too, changes our identity.  After being "mom" for all of those years (and loving it, I might add) your role changes drastically.  My family was always very close and I always thought my children would be around.  A good part of getting older meant being with my grandchildren.

In January of this year I started a full-time job in a field completely unrelated to what I've been involved in for 30 something years.  Getting used to working for someone other than my husband and being there from 8:00 am to 4:30 pm has been interesting.  Again, never thought this is how things would be at this stage of my life.

So, things just haven't turned out like I would have liked.  Now it's up to me to get it together and figure out what is going to happen in my future.  

A visit from Aimee and Lucas

Check out this little darlin on his recent visit to Florida. I am going through so many changes in my life these days, it's kind of hard to put it all in perspective. Having my grandchildren so far away can be really upsetting . But, staying really busy and having new things happen helps. I just want to say that I have been so incredibly blessed with an amazing husband, children that any parent would die for and now all of these beautiful grandchildren. Wonder sometimes about the uncertainty of my future but I trust that all will be well.

MAKING A COMMITMENT

Ok, I haven't posted anything in a really long time. I am starting tonight and hope to make blogging a part of my day, every day. I have so much to catch up on, pictures to post, so much has happened. So, this is my beginning, not much but a start.

RANDOM THOUGHTS

So many thoughts going through my mind this morning. Thought I'd post and see if my mind would settle down a little bit.

Chris and Aimee are on my mind so strong this morning. I am so stoked about being a grandmother again. People dread getting old but if they only knew how awesome becoming a grandparent is, they wouldn't give it a thought. I miss all of them so much. Being so far away is probably the most difficult thing I've had to deal with. But, I know that it is all for a reason and everything will work out.

I made a Light Spinach Frittata for my breakfast this morning. Man, was that good. We are on the South Beach diet, started Monday and we are doing well. But, cooking sure does make a mess and it is almost like a job to prepare food for a diet. I would love to be able to cook and have someone come in behind me and clean up, HA! I also made cilantro mayonnaise for the turkey roll up snacks. More mess. I should be in there cleaning up the kitchen instead of being on this computer. I would love to go to Paris to a cooking school, wouldn't that be awesome???

Got a phone call and all of the random thoughts that I was going to post about are gone. Oh well.

I am so excited. Pat won tickets to a Magic game at the last poker tournament. We are going tomorrow night. He called me the other day and asked me out for a date Friday night. Sweet :)

I have done really well raising money for "Tanner's Team". My goal was $500.00. I never dreamed that I would come close to that. Just made it high to push myself. Let's see, I think I have $480.00, wow, could that be????? Shannon called me yesterday and Tanner talked to me and said, "I love you" when he got ready to hang up. Sweet little boy.

So much to do around here and no real motivation. Yard work, garden work, house work, garage work, yuk. Don't want to do any of it.

Love to look at my pictures from Chris and Aimee of Easter. I know what I also want to do, get prints made and start an album. Get with it girl.

Guess this is enough random stuff.

GRAMMYSHAM

RANDOM THOUGHTS

WHAT'S GOIN ON

I am in a state of limbo it seems. I need to try to stop worrying about things that aren't happening and focus on what is happening. I cancelled the appointment yesterday with the volunteer coordinator at Cape Canaveral Hospital. I took Pat to see his cardiologist in Melbourne instead. He has been having some discomfort in his chest, upper shoulders and neck. The other night he had pain in his left arm along with the discomfort. So, he is concerned and decided that he should see the doctor. The doc put him back on nitro pills and scheduled tests tomorrow. He is having a nucular (ha, sorry, couldn't resist) stress test and and echo cardiogram. So, hopefully these tests will tell us if something is going on with his heart and if so, he can have something done about it. Keep him in prayer.

I have been reading this old "Upper Room" book (July-August 2009) that I picked up at church a couple of weeks ago. Wow, God has been speaking to me through this. I never thought that I would say such a thing, but I am. I had this whole volunteering thing going through my mind yesterday and this morning. Kind of worrying about not doing it. But, I know that right now I need to see what's happening with Pat before I commit myself to something. The page that I am on for today (in the Upper Room) is about volunteering. The gist of the article is a person started volunteering after retirement and became stressed etc. She asked herself why she was volunteering. Anyway, she said that she learned to pull back some and spend more time in prayer and reflection. "In neglecting my inner being, I was becoming spiritually unbalanced." The "Thought for the Day" was - To be effective volunteers, we need spiritual balance. I had another experience a week ago with another bible verse and article in this book. Hum, interesting.

So, I am giving up meat for Lent. I don't really think it will be that difficult for me. I eat soy products already. I should probably give up diet coke. That would be more difficult. I suppose just thinking about giving up anything is a good thing. Might be kinda hard to eat soy and fish for 40 days. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can, ha!

I have things that I need to do. I want to make pictures of "my girls" and get them on the wall in the family room. Seems like I am just procrastinating about things these days. Get it together girl.

Jessie and David have been spending time here which is really nice. I enjoy having them around SOOOOO much. Family is everything.

I miss my Phoenix family. I suppose that will always be a given and I have to adjust to it. Videos and Skype really help.

Well, gotta run. I have things to do today and Charlie has been patient for quite a long time:)